Marriage in Ijaw culture By Goto Emmanuel

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“The root of a tree enables its size. So, the history of a tree starts from its root and if mistakenly forgotten, its meaning cannot be actualized.” Ebi asserted in a conference while contributing salient issues of the Ijaw marriage culture.

 

Let’s not bother to decipher the proverbial statement, but respond to Ebiere who was eager to know her husband’s culture in the conference. Indeed, culture is a total way of life and there is no hidden fact as the organizers of the conference were exhibiting their Ijaw culture uniquely.

 

Ijaws are one of the tribes situated at the coastal regions majorly in Nigeria. We Ijaws are naturally blessed to succour neighbouring tribes whenever the need arises. Marriage cultures among the Ijaws are multifaceted in view but similar processes.

 

As an African tribe, Ijaws majorly engage in polygamous marriage system which is mainly for communal development in the society by teaching the wives how to relate well with other people. Marrying plenty of wives is a practice inculcating by most Ijaws which has greatly helped in the aspect of the division of labour in order to gain easy access to wealth. However, few of the Ijaws especially in this modern era prefer monogamous home.

 

When a man wants to marry, it is his responsibility to seek hand in marriage from a girl of his choice. When such is done, three of the groom’s family is entitled to inform the bride’s family early to mitigate the level of fear on the parent with a bottle of wine that their daughter is with them.

 

Thereafter, the head of the family would draw the attention of the bride’s parent and break the news. If the bride family would not concur, their spokesmen will inform the groom spokesmen reasons and if accepted, the request would be made to pay dowry as soon as possible.

 

As the custom demands, they are entitled to pay dowry as a sign to display uniqueness and inform the groom spokesmen that their daughter is not for sell, but to show her quality value.

 

As itemized always; the bride’s parent is entitled to a particular amount of money, a specific amount for the youths, a gallon of local wine for the whole family, a specific amount in form of compensation to stop business owners in the family from going to works and other due compensation for the bride’s paternal and maternal families.

 

All these processes would be duly observed in humble approach by the three spokesmen from the groom’s family and must mellow down thrice as a sign to beseech the bride’s family in order to alleviate huge demands before they will pay any amount.

 

For the groom, it is the responsibility of his family to welcome the new wife. The bride would be garb always like a queen with expensive beads and must be decorated with adorable dressers within the interval of Ayoro. The bride who is ascribed as AYORO (new wife) among the Ijaws is celebrated and honoured like a queen and must exhibit royal qualities throughout the era, but must always show sign of honour to visitors by kneeling down.

 

Within this period, the bride will not be allowed to perform domestic functions and must invariably garb in Africa attires. Usually, visitors are meant to welcome the new bride with a token of money and other special gifts. Even the groom is not allowed to walk anyhow as he is meant to enjoy his first marriage period.

 

After the due process of paying dowry, both families can fix a date to celebrate with each other. Basically, the huge marriage celebration is marked in this process where famous Ijaw musicians like Barrister Smooth, Pere-ama Freetown, etc display their musical talents. Both families dine and wine with each other because of the uniqueness of Ijaw marriage culture.

 

The bride and groom parents are entitled to attire majestically to show their sincere joy. Parents are to bless the marriage of their daughter with her husband traditionally by giving them wine. This is regarded as the final stage because the traditional rites are fulfilled which grant the permission to live freely as a recognized spouse in Ijaw land.

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